An advice from old friend

September 4, 2008 – 9:28 pm by Bakar Man | No Comments »  Email This Post  |  No Comments »

Love - Marriage

September 4, 2008 – 9:25 pm by Bakar Man | No Comments »  Email This Post  |  No Comments »

A Student asks a sage, “What is love?”

The sage replied, “in order to answer your question, go to the wheat field and choose the biggest wheat and come back. But the rule is: you can go through it only once and cannot turn back to pick.”

The student went to the field, going thru first row, he saw one big wheat, but he wondered…. may be there is a bigger one later. Then he saw another bigger one… but may be there is an even bigger one waiting for him.

Later, when he finished more than half of the wheat field, he started to realize that the wheat is not as big as the previous one he saw, he knew he had missed the biggest one, and he regretted. So, he ended up went back to the sage with an empty hand.

The sage told him, “..this is love.. you keep looking for a better one, but when later you realize, you have already missed the person….”*

“What is marriage then?” the student asked.

The sage said, “in order to answer your question, go to the corn field and choose the biggest corn and come back. But the rule is same you can go through it only once and cannot turn back to pick.”

The student went to the corn field, this time he is careful not to repeat the previous mistake, when he reach the middle of the field, he picked one medium corn that he felt would satisfy, and came back to the sage.

The sage told him, “this time you brought back a corn…. you looked for one that is just nice, and you had faith and believed this is the best one you get…. this is marriage.”

Secret of happy married life

April 23, 2008 – 11:40 am by Bakar Man | No Comments »  Email This Post  |  No Comments »

Once X asked Y, “What is the secret behind your happy married life?”

Y said, “You should share responsibilities with due love and respect to each other. Then absolutely there
will be no problems.”

X asked, “Can you explain?”

Y said, “In my house, I take decisions on bigger issues where as my wife decides on smaller issues. We
do not interfere in each other’s decisions.”

Still not convinced, X asked Y “Give me some examples”

Y said,” Smaller issues like which car we should buy, how much amount to save, when to visit home town,
which Sofa, air conditioner, refrigerator to buy, monthly expenses, whether to keep a maid or not etc
are decided by my wife. I just agree to it”

X asked, “Then what is your role?”

Y said,” My decisions are only for very big issues. Like whether America should attack Iran, whether
Britain should lift sanction over Zimbabwe, whether to widen African economy, whether Sachin Tendulkar should
retire etc etc. Do you know one thing, my wife NEVER objects to any of these”.

Presence of mind!

April 23, 2008 – 3:24 am by Bakar Man | No Comments »  Email This Post  |  No Comments »

In a shop a man asked for 1/2 kg of butter. The salesperson, a young boy, said that only 1kg packs were available in the shop, but the man insisted on buying only 1/2 kg.

 So the boy went inside to the manager’s room and said “An idiot outside wants to buy only 1/2 kg of butter”. To his surprise, the customer was standing behind him. So the boy added immediately, “And this gentleman wants to buy the other half!!!!!!”.
 After the customer left, the manager said “You have saved your position by being clever enough at the right time. Where do you come from?” To this the boy said, “I come from Mexico. The place consists of only prostitutes and football players!!!!!”

The manager replied coldly, “My wife is also from Mexico”.

To this the boy asked excitedly, “Oh yeah? Which team does she play for?”

How’s that? Believe in your presence of mind and never panic!

Thought of the day

April 16, 2008 – 6:12 am by Bakar Man | No Comments »  Email This Post  |  No Comments »

Knowledge Guru

April 15, 2008 – 8:23 am by Bakar Man | No Comments »  Email This Post  |  No Comments »

Thought of the day

April 15, 2008 – 8:20 am by Bakar Man | No Comments »  Email This Post  |  No Comments »

One of the best posters I have ever seen. Hits right at the center.

The war on poverty

April 12, 2008 – 2:34 pm by rohan | No Comments »  Email This Post  |  No Comments »

No. You’re wrong. This isn’t an excerpt pinched off from the latest elect-candidate’s manifesto. So, stop guessing now.
Poverty plays a big role when it comes to winning elections, making speeches, making commercials or to just appear on T.V. Everybody has been heard from on the subject except the poor people themselves. So I decided to go out and interview a poor person and ask him what he thought about it. It’s very difficult, mind you, to get hold of a poor person these days, because nobody likes to admit poor.
So, I finally found a man in the rundown section of the city who was willing to admit that he was poor and was also willing to talk about it.
I started by asking him if he thought he would like to serve on a committee to see what could be done about poverty.
“Mister, if I had any idea about what should be done regarding poverty, I wouldn’t be poor”he reminded me.
“But there’s a school of thought that poor people are the only ones who know the real problems of the poor, and they should be strongly involved in the program to formulate and implement anti-poverty programs.”

“I wouldn’t participate unless they would pay me “ he said.
“Oh I’m sure they would pay you. If they agreed to pay you, what is the first thing you would do?”
“I’d move out of the neighbourhood”
“But if you move out of the neighbourhood, you would lose contact with the poor people and you would no longer be able to speak for tthem.”
“Exactly. Poor people don’t want to be spoken for.They just want to get the hell out of this neighbourhood. Asking poor people how to win war on poverty is like asking President Musharaff how to win the war on terror.”
“You’ve got a point there. But there is a great deal of pressure to have poor people work out their own destinies in the anti-poverty program.”
“Okay, then let them put everybody who is poor on a anti-poverty committee and pay them all a salary. Once they’re on a salary, you’ll solve every problem a poor person has. And they’ll move the hell out of the neighbourhood.”
“on the surface this sounds like a good solution to the problem, but it would put great financial strain on the government.”
“Yea, but if you put people on salary, you wouldn’t have to make welfare payments, and the poor people would pay taxes, so it would eventually even out.”
“I agree”, I said, “but if you put all the poor people on the anti-povert committee and paid them, you would eliminate poverty and there would be no reason to have the committee”
“I’m not sure about that.As soon as people get aa salary, they can get all the credit they want fromn the banks and finance companies. The more you borrow, the poorer you becom. As long as there are credit companies,there will always be poor people.”
“It makes a lot of sense,” I admitted. “You seem to have thought this out pretty well”
“When you’re poor, you have nothing else to think about.”
“I wonder why the government hasn’t thought of it”
“Because they’re afraid we’d all move the hell out of the neighbourhood.”

Cablewallahs

April 11, 2008 – 8:55 am by rohan | No Comments »  Email This Post  |  No Comments »

They call it ‘ether-net’ . I thought they had misspelled internet. But I was later proved wrong and that boisterous long cable (which should actually be named cabasilisk, for its killer technology) was what they called their ‘latesht’ technological dingy thing. I confess, i suggested the idea of shifting to Sifi (name changed to protect privacy). BSNL seemed too expensive or boisterous. Its nice to flaunt that idea of having a private internet service provider like Sifi technologies(India) Ltd. instead of an uncreative, plain and boring name like just BSNL.
Trouble always succeeds brilliance, or at least I reason it that way. After I pulled off that brilliant spoof over BSNL and finally got rid of it,I realized what an ordeal Sifi was (and still is).If the BSNL modem couldn’t understand my apathy during troubled times, Sifi shows me a finger and asks me to stick it up you-know-where.
The local area connection is a particularly obtrusive creation by those genius minds who’ve given us the ether-net itself . The local area connections acts like a wind-meter which does a brilliant job in informing me about the speed of the wind. If the connection goes off in one go and doesn’t come back until the next day, its a usual wind just blowing and doing its job. If it goes on an off now and appears to be playing ‘ catch-me-on-if-you-can’, its a stronger wind. If the local area connection has backed out some four hours ago and your local technician accepts without a ‘grrr’ or something like that, screw the wind get to that Sifi office as quickly as you can.

On one such occasion, I promptly informed those cable wallahs to check up with the problem. Two exhibits arrived. I was quick in showing them the problem.I tried connecting and the technological wonder seemed to have given up on me. I told them, how I had tried to reconfigure my LAN card. Those two fools simply gaped at my wonder-la computer.
The bigger of the two exhibits finally spoke up. Your LAN card has broken down, he said.
There are moments in one’s life when the person opposite speaks of the unthinkable and all one can do is break out and scream a yell. A mere yell in this case just wouldn’t suffice. I wanted to smite that ass and do anything but go easy on his jaw.But something stopped me from it. I listened to him and enquired for reasons. I also reminded him that I had purchased that piece of nonsense from him and the warranty period had not yet lapsed.To my disbelief, he told me ,’people themselves don’t come with warranty , how do you expect an electronic item to come with a warranty?’
I remained a mere spectator to his brilliance, unable to recover from the shock.I still am trying hard to recover from that shock. The Local Area Connection is working although gives me jitters now and then, as for that brilliant technician, his activities seem to have become more dormant or may be there are more benign customers to trouble.

Manager and Team member

April 11, 2008 – 1:48 am by Bakar Man | No Comments »  Email This Post  |  No Comments »

We all know this one

One day a man was having a conversation with God when his whole life flashed before his eyes as a series of footsteps on the sands of time. He saw that there were two pairs of footprints, but during the most difficult periods of his life there were only one set of footprints. He asked God “You said you will be with me throughout this journey, but why have you deserted me during the most critical times of my life??” to which God answered “Son, I did not desert you, I was always with you…you see only one set of footprints

Because during those difficult times in your life, I was carrying you in my hands”

Now know this one too!!!

Another day I was having a similar conversation with my Manager when my whole project flashed before my eyes as a series of footsteps on the sands of time. I saw that there were two pairs of footprints, but during the most difficult times in the project there were only one set of footprints. I asked my Manager “You said you will be with me throughout the project, but why have you deserted me during the most critical times of the project??” to which the Manager answered “Son, I did not desert you, I was always with you…you see only one set of footprints because during those difficult times, I was sitting on your head!!”